We Can Only Be Friends In An Emergency

When my long term lover moved away to Indiana from New Jersey I wondered what I would do to replace his physical touch. We had had a very physical and emotional connection for a year and a half which I had grown accustomed to. Suddenly, one day he was gone. He moved back to his hometown to live with family following the loss of his job. We were sad.

I had only heard of the term fuck buddies, but never had one having married my first boyfriend at a young age.

Said husband checked out of the picture in 2015, and I started to date for the first time in my life. I met hoosier boy right away and we really clicked. I dated around for a time during my relationship with him because he was into polyamory and convinced me to try it.

I went out with Pete a few times and thought he was very handsome. It took me a while to catch on to the fact that Pete was “only interested in one thing” as my grandmother used to say. I wasn’t ready for that kind of relationship when we first met.

Fast forward two years, countless first dates, a few flings and the departure of my steady lover. The gears started turning. Maybe I should try “hooking up” with Pete? There wasn’t much of a connection between us but we were on the same page as far as seeing sex as a necessary ingredient in life.

He works nights as a bartender and lives alone a few towns over. We figured out I could visit before he gets ready for work. I was generally the one who looked for him in the morning if I wanted to come over. We didn’t go out again after I started going for visits during the day. It was pretty much all business with me and Pete. I guess I was a good little fuck friend for him since I didn’t ask for anything else.

I gradually phased Pete out of my life as I got tired of the casual, loosely connected routine with him. In the interim, I also met a nice guy a year ago who is keeping me satisfied in many ways eliminating the need to visit Pete.

I think he misses me. He knows I’ve been involved with someone new, but he still texts me occasionally to flirt and ask where I am and if I want to fuck. It’s fun to play along sometimes and to be pursued. I’ve been resisting the urge to go see him just for sex. I’ve made it clear that I’m not interested in quick daytime visits to his house. One of my last texts to him plainly told him he is my “emergency guy”. He said “Deal”. There hasn’t been an emergency since hoosier boy moved away.